


I know what I need

by jazminelovesboyz12



Category: Sebastian Stan - Fandom
Genre: Caring Sebastian, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-03
Updated: 2018-07-03
Packaged: 2019-06-04 19:39:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15154211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jazminelovesboyz12/pseuds/jazminelovesboyz12





	I know what I need

Here is my first Sebastian fic! I really hope you guys like it, I was feeling a little angsty.  
My tag list is still very open, so feel free to send me an ask to be added to it And YEAH, when I say Antoni, I mean ‘Queer Eye” Antoni. 

This was originally posted on my Tumblr (iluvvharrie) and I have a few other works on there that I plan to upload here , but feel free to check that out as well.

Word count: 1837  
Warnings: Cussing, mentions of sex  
Paring: Sebastian Stan x Reader 

 

You fidgeted, straightening out your clothes as you sat on the plush couch next to your costar, Sebastian Stan. Two years ago, at this time, hell, a few months ago, you would’ve been ecstatic to be sitting next to him, but now, you couldn’t get away faster.  
“So, you two are here promoting the new Avengers movie! Anything you guys can tell us?” The sweet interviewer sat across from you two, note cards in hand, and a wide, genuine smile on her face.  
“Well not much we can give away and still keep our jobs,” Sebastian answered first, probably knowing you wouldn’t jump to answer much of anything unless you were addressed. It wasn’t you trying to be rude, or seem aloof, you just tended to observe more than anything. You were also constantly questioning the people in charge of setting up these interviews and asking why two of the quietest cast members were continuously being put in interviews together.

“My lips are sealed,” You kept your eyes on her, even though you could feel Sebastian looking at you. 

“Well I like the both of you, so we wanna keep you around,”

“Yeah, I like her too,” Sebastian looked at you again and the interviewer eyed the both of you happily.

“I always liked you guys together- well more the idea of you guys together.”

You nodded politely, but Sebastian spoke up, still gazing at you.

“Me too,”  
-

 

“I just wanna sleep, Monica,” You groaned to your pleading manager. 

“Please come out and be social, I’ll beg. Do you want me to beg?” Monica had become one of your best friends. She fully supported you, but didn’t let you make a fool of yourself, treated you with respect, and she knew all of your secrets. 

“I don’t want to be anywhere near him, sorry.” You got up from the lounge chair placed in the luxurious hotel room and began to look through your suitcase for comfy clothes.

“Sebastian won’t bother you, I’ll make sure of it.”  
You scoffed at the statement and continued looking, pulling out a pair of black fuzzy socks.

“Did you see him today? I hardly think he’ll leave me alone. Don’t see why either, I’ve left him alone. Wish he could do the same,” You’d began mumbling toward the end, remembering sitting so close to him on that couch earlier. You could still smell him, feel him next to you. 

“I know, I know,” She rose, walking in three strides to meet you and sat on the floor next to you.

“But babe, please. We all miss you coming out with us. Antoni, Nicole, and especially me!” She pouted at you before placing her hands on yours, stopping your movements. 

“Please, Y/N, if you don’t have a good time, I won’t ask you to go out when he’s around anymore, but were in a beautiful city! You shouldn’t have to be stuck in your hotel room because some asshole guy screwed you over, Sebastian isn’t a good guy, and we know now that he didn’t have good intentions. He’s no good, Y/N” 

And you were so mad at yourself, so disgusted, because you almost defended him.  
-  
You stared at yourself in the bathroom, getting a good look at yourself clad in a tight, long sleeved, off the shoulder black dress. You ran your hands through your hair, smoothed out the dress and sucked in a deep breath. A pound on the door pulled you away from yourself, and you began cleaning up your mess on the counter.

“I’m coming!”  
“Hurry up, bitch!” Nicole shouted through the door.  
“We’re all ready,” Antoni chimed in and you pulled open the door.  
“Then let’s go,” You stepped into your shoes.  
“Listen if he doesn’t try to fuck you, I will,” Nicole’s eyes raked up your body and you waved her off.  
“Yeah, really.” Antoni praised in approval.  
“Yeah well, we aren’t trying to get him to fuck her, we just want to have a good time. Remember?” Monica reminded them as she ushered you all out the door.  
-  
The club wasn’t too full, or too empty, nor was it too dark or too hot, and you could still have comfortable conversation. You were having such a good time that your nerves about Sebastian had been washed away.

“Whatever you do, don’t turn around,” Nicole muttered to you, before rejoining the conversation. You didn’t even have time to over think, as a hand was on your shoulder, and you didn’t even have to look up to know who it was. But you did anyway.

“You look gorgeous,” Sebastian had leaned in to speak clearly into your ear before addressing the rest of the table.  
“I’m going to go get some air,” You directed to your friends, before taking your phone and sliding out of the booth you’d been in. When you got outside, you deeply breathed in the fresh air and pressed yourself up against the building.

“Y/N,” A sigh escaped you without a second thought at the familiar voice and you snapped your head to look at him.  
“What do you want from me?  
“I don’t want you to hate me anymore,”

You shook your head and looked at the blue-eyed man incredulously. 

 

“I wish I fucked Chris Evans instead,” and then you turned to walk away, you didn’t know where, but you didn’t care either, as your feet were carrying you down the street.

“Hey, you don’t mean that,” Sebastian caught your arm, a wounded look on his face, lips turned down into a frown.

“Or maybe I just mean I wish I hadn’t fucked anyone or had any expectations. That’s what gets your heart broken, isn’t it?”  
He sighed then, still loosely holding your arm before you were shrugging out of his grasp. 

“Can we talk somewhere privately? Please, I don’t want us to be headlining tomorrow. And I really want to fix this with you,”  
-  
After a bit of aimless walking, and a few texts to assure your safety, you two wound up in the booth at the back of a very quiet diner. 

“I’ll just have a coffee, please.”

“I’ll take the same,” Sebastian nodded up at the kind waitress and she turned to grab them for you.

“Y/N,” 

“What do you want to hear, Sebastian?” Your brows were pulled together, heart hammering in your chest.

“I don’t want to hear anything in particular, I just want to hear about how you’re feeling. What went wrong for you?” He looked genuinely confused, and that what made you so upset. He looked like he really cared, and his words weighed heavily on you, they willed you to speak.

“I always liked you, it was silly, but I did. When I got casted in the marvel movies, I was over the moon, not just about the film opportunity, but all of the people I'd get to work with. Then there was you. You were so kind, funny, smart, and we were so similar,”

The waitress arrived, quickly and quietly setting down your mugs.

“You made it so easy for me to fall for you. I would be done anything for you, so I did. I’d travel to your home to spend the night, I woke up early to see you, I listened to you vent, I shopped with you at the mall, I did everything. And I feel so silly, because when I lay it all out, we were only friends, just friends. But somewhere in between, I got too caught up but maybe you did too. Or maybe you just knew that I was damn near in love with you, so you took that and ran with it. I gave so much away to you, not just physically, but emotionally and when you disregarded that it tore me apart.” You were nearly in tears, hands shaking from your nerves, watery eyes, and your heart felt like it was in your throat. 

“Y-you stopped speaking to me. You forgot about me and moved on to someone else, and that tore me up.” You stopped speaking, still looking into his now dark blue eyes.  
“Y/N, I cared about you, I still really do. I liked you too, quite a bit actually, and I couldn’t believe you wanted anything to do with me. I was on top of the world when I finally had you, but I was so damn scared of not being able to give you what you wanted, what you needed. I cherished everything, I still do. I remember everything you said to me, I think about you constantly. That other woman was a mistake, and I feel terrible, I’m disgusted with myself for bringing her into this. I was so selfish, so foolish for leaving you when I finally had you, but I did, and I’d give anything to rewind time so I could fix it.” He was pleading with you now, and there were tears threatening to fall from your eyes. 

“Why did you leave me? Why? I could’ve- I would’ve loved you forever, Sebastian, I swear I would’ve,” 

“Because I didn’t deserve you, you could do better, Y/N, I –”

“Don’t tell me what I need, I know what I need. And I know what I want, it’s you, it’s always been you. You just need to let me.”  
Your eyes never lost his, even when he was sliding in the both next to you and taking your head in his hands, puling the two of you together, lips finally meeting again.  
It’s so cliché, but it felt like the fourth of July when your lips met again. Your heart was so full, your soul was happy. You reached up to place your hand on top of his as you relaxed into the kiss, tilting your head and spreading your lips just enough.  
When he pulled away, he stayed close, enough to look at you directly.

“I’m sorry I let you down the first time, Y/N. I am, I’ll hate myself forever for that. But, if you’ll have me, please god, I hope you’ll have me.”

“Please carry my heart carefully, Sebastian, I can’t keep giving it away.”

“I promise baby, this time is different. I swear,”  
-  
Despite you best efforts, you and Sebastian still headlined the gossip magazines the next day. Photos of you two kissing in the booth, looking at each other intimately, and the pictures from outside of the club.

“You look really good,” Sebastian said from beside you where you sat in his hotel room bed.

“Yeah? You do too, the black jeans, white shoe thing really works for you,”  
You took you bottom lip between your teeth, skimming over the pictures again before locking your phone and pulling the covers further over your body.

“I’m the happiest today with you than I’ve been since we last spoke,” Sebastian’s eye were scanning you, his head propped up on his hand.

“Let’s make it last forever, then,” You mumbled, not being able to meet his eyes when you said it, but when you looked up, his eyes were the softest blue you’d seen them.

“Sounds like a plan,” 

And then his lips were on yours.


End file.
